Recent scenes from a marriage

First scene, interior, nighttime, bedroom. The room is dark except for the glare of an ipad, which the woman is reading from in bed. A man arrives and undoes the covers on his side, looking tired, lying down as well. Just as his head hits the pillow, he jumps out with surprise and horror. He turns on the light and returns to bed, where he finds a metallic toy robot at his place, all perfectly tucked in.

The man, looking at the woman: ?????

The woman: Yeah, right, I forgot. Victor the Robot needed to take a nap.
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Second scene, interior, nighttime, living room. The same couple is there, him working at the computer, her reading the latest issue of National Geographic. The following conversation occurs without them looking at each other.

The woman, thinking out loud: What? The Inca were still flourishing around 1500?

The man: Yes. What's your point?

The woman: Nothing, I just thought that this civilization peeked earlier.

The man: Well, they were still thriving until the Europeans arrived.

The woman, smiling: These damn Europeans. They really sc*ewed up everything didn't they?

The man: Don't say that... If they hadn't come to the New World, we...

The woman, still smiling, interrupting him: ...we wouldn't live in a place that was totally inhospitable to begin with and where all there is are either terribly harsh winters that can literally kill you or terribly humid summers when you are literally eaten by mosquitoes?

The man: Point taken.

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Third scene, exterior, day, besides a car. The (slender) woman is trying to help a little boy get into his car seat, but space is very limited around them. The man is on the other side, buckling a baby girl.

The woman: Good thing you're not very big ("pas très gros", which in French means both big and fat)...

The boy, innocently: Oh yes! Good thing I'm not as big/fat as you are because then I could never get in!

The man smiles demoniacally, aware that he's now going to have a new, very fruitful pool of wisecracks at his disposition.

The woman: Don't you even think about it, you smart*ss.

The man, grinning: Well you know what they say... Better a smart*ss than a fat one!