Here's one wedding that won't soon be featured on Style Me Pretty...

Adapted from an article (in French) in La Presse this morning.

In a local court yesterday, a 38-year old man, let's call him Mr. Greatpartyfriend, has been cleared of molestation and assault charges which occurred during a 2007 wedding. Why? Because the 45-year old bride (Ms. Classylady) confessed that she assaulted the victim (Ms. Goodtasteinmen) herself.

Mr. Greatpartyfriend attended the wedding of Ms. Classylady, and had been asked by her and the groom to buy and bring various drugs for the occasion. Mr. Greatpartyfriend brought Ms. Goodtasteinmen, which he had been seeing for 3 weeks, as a guest. Once at the reception, Ms. Goodtasteinmen was surprised to realize that Mr. Greatpartyfriend was introducing her as "his cousin." She then found out that Mr. Greatpartyfriend was still involved with a woman he had been with for the last seven years, AND that the bride's sister was in love with him and DID NOT have sex (Clinton/Lewinski-style) with him right there at the wedding. Outraged, Ms. Goodtasteinmen started yelling at Mr. Greatpartyfriend and picked up a verbal fight, which, sadly, kind of killed the buzz of the wedding.

It is then unclear what happened exactly, but Ms. Goodtasteinmen was severely beaten to the point where she lost a tooth, a shoe and her cell phone. She was later picked up outside in a trench by other guests who called 911, and was then taken care of by paramedics.

Ms. Goodtasteinmen stated in her complaint that Mr. Greatpartyfriend assaulted her, and even sexually molested her. Mr. Greatpartyfriend, though, always argued that he saw Ms. Goodtasteinmen in a fight with "another woman".

So Ms. Classylady finally admitted that she beat up the victim after looking for her to confront her about ruining her wedding, and finally finding her outside. When the enraged victim started yelling at her that this was an "douchebag" wedding and that her whole family were "tramps," it did it for the bride. Ms. Classylady then punched Ms. Goodtastedinmen in the face "at least" 4 or 5 times, and then grabbed her from the ground and dragged her on the gravel driveway to the trench. When the judge asked why the bride had not confessed of all of this earlier, she replied that she felt "her criminal record was too heavy already."

No word about who designed the wedding dress.